The Hoover or for those who like to be accurate - the vacuum cleaner!

The spiders that live here have little idea

What us poor arachnophobes feel

When they unexpectedly make an appearance

Although they must hear when we squeal

So I have little sympathy when with the hoover

I send them to that web in the sky

But the problem has been with constructing said tool

Which caused hubby to swear if not cry

The cat even ventured from out of the kitchen

To witness this strange, rare event

Of a red bit of plastic held this way and that

to try to decide where it went

When finally we had accomplished the task

Of getting the pieces to fit

My hubby decided it looked cheap and nasty

and said “I don't like it one bit”

He decided the best thing for him now to do

Was take the thing back to the store

And get them to swop it for something much better

Although it might cost a bit more.

So piece by piece twas disassembled

till only one bit was remaining

“I don't think I'm able to get this part out”

He said with much effort and straining.

I thought it was best to stay silent

As he started undoing the screws

He now had an excess of pieces

I felt that this wasn't good news!

The cat had decided to make a swift exit

The fun part was over, he knew

I finally found my lost voice once again

“Err, what are you going to do?”

“Well there's only one option that's left”, he replied

“We'll just have to keep it, make do

So I'll just pop it all back together again

Does that sound alright, dear to you?”

“Oh yes, what a fine sounding plan” I agreed

“I expect 'twill be quicker this time

And then maybe, perhaps we could give it a try

And check that it's working just fine”

Well between you and me, I'm most grateful

The thing worked first time without flaw

For I have to admit, I was wondering

If I could take very much more

So you see what I mean about spiders

And their thoughtless behaviour when here

I won't tolerate any sightings

For I've had quite enough, is that clear?

With hoover I'm armed and I'm dangerous

There's nowhere to run or to hide

It may look a bit cheap and nasty

But I'll brandish my hoover with pride!

Karen Holmes

31 October 2010