Little Old Me

Written after reading this "You are not what you think you are, you are what He says you are"

I'm created for your purpose
But I feel so unprepared
I step outside my comfort zone
And suddenly, I'm scared.

You really should know better, God
I'm not the one you need
There's loads of other Christians
Oh - use someone else, I plead.

Somebody more outspoken
Someone who has more nerve
Find me a quiet corner
And gladly there I'll serve.

It was all very well when you called me
I was feeling brave and strong
But now I'm beginning to doubt Lord
Perhaps I heard you wrong.

Perhaps it's all a big mistake
You meant to use somebody else
Somebody clever and learned
Or someone with better health

Oh Lord I'm clutching at straws now
And any excuse will do
I'm created for your purpose
But how can I serve you?

I'm just me, Lord, Just little old me
And I wish you'd understand
You need someone greater than me
For this task which you have planned.

Ask anyone - they'll tell you
You've made a most foolish choice.
Yet still in the back of my mind
I hear your patient voice..........

"Yes I am your creator,
There's nothing I don't know
I planned each detail of your life
the ways that you would go

When you look into a mirror
You see the outer shell
But I can see the inner you
The one I know so well

And you have no idea
of the things that I have planned
If you let me lead you forward
If you take hold of my hand

You are pointing out your weaknesses
but in them, I am strong
so step outside your comfort zone
and let me prove you wrong"

Karen Holmes
14th September 2005.

An Empty Cross

Oh how their hopes must have fallen
Trampled underfoot in the dust
Waiting for something to stop the process
For surely something must.

They'd believed in him – been so certain
That he was God's son as he claimed

Yet here he was, sentenced to death
Hideously tortured and shamed

How their hearts despaired, now leaden

Empty of life, somehow betrayed

Seeing how deeply even he agonised

As in the garden in darkness he'd prayed.

And God – dare we say we comprehend
That desperate loss of hope

That extinguished flame, that darkness
that fear that we'll never cope

As we rend our clothes – our souls lay bare
Wounded, tormented, questioning, lost
We cry out for a resurrection
An Easter morn, an empty cross

Oh God, in our afflictions come,

Bring us new life in greater measure

new strength to rise again and live

through sorrow somehow find our treasure

For Lord, you know the reasons why
we beseech you for your grace

From the ashes bring redemption
Send your healing to this place

Victory for those first disciples

Hope reignited, Light restored,

Victory ours through our redeemer
Risen, glorious, sovereign Lord.

Karen Holmes
2/4/2015